I Thought I Was Bragging. Turns Out, I Was Just Being Me!

This week, I attended the "Small & Mighty" Awards hosted by Change Connect in Markham, Toronto. Third Wunder was a finalist for the "New Business of the Year" Award, an honour in itself, but we didn’t win.

I was genuinely excited to be nominated. Before the ceremony began, I found myself sitting at a table with other finalists. None of us would end up winning, but in that moment, there was shared anticipation in the air. As we moved into the main event, I caught myself wondering what I’d say if our name was called. I watched other winners walk up, smile, wave, and offer thanks. I pictured myself doing the same.

When our category came up, my heart started to race. I felt a surge of pride seeing our company name listed. As the DJ dropped a drumroll, it felt like the moment just before a slot machine lands. The reels spin, the energy spikes… and then, just like that ......... no win.

There was a small moment of deflation. Still, I was proud. I shared the finalist poster on Instagram because, honestly, it was exciting just to be up there.

After the ceremony, as I mingled with other attendees and got to know the crowd, I struck up a conversation with one of the judges. He had reviewed our nomination and had high praise for our work. He admired what we do, how we do it, and who we do it for. But then came a comment that stuck with me:

"You didn’t win because you didn’t brag enough. I wish you had hyped up what you do more."

I was taken aback. Shooketh as the kids say these days!

Because in my mind, I had been bragging. I spoke with pride about our work, our clients, and the causes we support. I thought I was communicating passion and excellence. But what he heard was humility, maybe even understatement.

When Cultural Wiring Clashes with Context

That moment triggered something deeper. I started thinking about where I come from, New Zealand, and how that upbringing shaped the way I present myself.

In Aotearoa, there's a cultural norm we call "tall poppy syndrome." If someone stands out too much or shines too brightly, they're often cut down. We value humility, collectivism, and team success over individual spotlight. Growing up under the influence of Māori and Kiwi values, I learned to talk about the “we,” not the “me.”

It’s not that we lack ambition. We just don’t lead with it. We value quiet competence over loud declarations. Where others might say “we’re the best,” we might say “we’re proud of what we’ve achieved, together.”

Bragging, Reframed

So what does it mean to brag in a world that rewards visibility and boldness?

In North American business culture, especially in the US, confidence is often the currency of credibility. It’s not just what you do, but how assertively you say it. That can feel performative or excessive to someone raised in a more modest environment.

Here in Canada, the tone is more reserved, yet even in this context, being vocal about success often tips the scales. That’s why the judge’s feedback surprised me. I thought I was expressing pride. Instead, I may have come across as too quiet.

Still, maybe he’s right.

Maybe I need to learn how to talk a bigger game. Maybe I need to own our impact more boldly, especially when the stakes are high.

Owning the Quiet Power of Confidence

This isn’t about adopting a false persona. It’s about learning how to communicate value clearly, confidently, and unapologetically.

We’ve built something beautiful at Third Wunder. We serve clients who are doing meaningful, difficult, and often unglamorous work. And we do it with craft, care, and clarity.

That deserves to be celebrated, and yes, hyped.

Don’t wait for permission to be proud of what you’ve done.
— Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie

So from now on, I will try to brag better. Not louder, just more fully. I want to talk more about what we do. Write more. Share more stories. Celebrate the wins, and do it publicly. With more people. With more joy.

We’ve done amazing things, and our clients love what we’ve done for them. That deserves a bigger splash.

Because if I don’t speak proudly about what we do, who will?

Final Thoughts

This experience reminded me that humility and pride aren’t opposites, they’re partners. You can honour your roots and still rise above the noise. You can celebrate community while still championing your contributions. As I head back to Montreal, I’m taking this lesson with me: next time, I’ll hype us harder, and without apology.